Keelisms

Alan Keele is my Pen and the Sword professor. I like everything about his class except the homework. Instead of doing it, I thought I'd share some funny things he's said in class.

"I’ve been a student since 1960, and you think you’re bored."

"The only thing [the TA] said that I disagree with is that the papers look pretty good."

"There’s an infinite number of things you can do wrong in this class."

"Actually put your head into the computer screen."

"Here the logic slides sideways off the page."

"Mormons gut feel that they are always on the right side."

"Can you see the problem with damning people to hell for old times?"

"It’s actually a real accident of history that we aren’t all speaking Turkish right now."

"My brother who is a retired religion professor and is suspicious of me gave me his usual lecture…"

"Mormons need to be inoculated against believing the wrong things."

"One time this actually made sense; forget about it now."

"My son and I spent two weeks in Spain randomly riding trains from one mosque to another and also admiring the beautiful women."

"I specialize in pedagogical chloroform—I put my students to sleep."

And a wise one:

"No human command or law exceeds God’s law to love our neighbor."

I <3 Keele.